Five years ago when I was making my adoption plan, I’d never heard of an entrustment ceremony, but I wish I had because I know now after hearing so much about them, that it is something I would of most definitely planned and done.

If the term “entrustment ceremony” is foreign to you, let me explain. An entrustment ceremony is an adoption ritual that acts as a symbolic gesture of the transferring of the parental role from the birthmother to the adoptive parents. It can give a birthmother the chance to symbolically say goodbye and provide a little closure. There is no right or wrong way to hold an entrustment ceremony – it can be tailored to the needs and desires of the people involved.

The term entrustment ceremony sounds fancy but it doesn’t have to be. It could be something as simple as going around the room and saying how you feel or more elaborate with a clergy person present. You can choose to read a special poem aloud, play a meaningful song, or light a candle. Some adoptive parents and birth parents use the entrustment ceremony as a time to state your intentions, hopes, and desires for each others’ future. If a birthmother already has a child or children, they can participate in the ceremony as well by either just being present or perhaps giving the baby a special drawing or a letter.

Now entrustment ceremonies are not for everyone. I have heard many birthmothers say that an entrustment ceremony would have been too hard and emotional for them.

In case an entrustment ceremony is something you are interested in, here are a few links to get you started.

• Entrustment Ceremonies: Creating Rituals in Open Adoption - Newsletter Article on Entrustment Ceremonies with examples



• Entrustment Ceremony Page on BirthMom Buds - Birthmother Abigail shares her thoughts on Entrustment Ceremonies along with a script from the ceremony she planned



• Insight's Entrustment Ceremony Page - Great explanation of Entrustment Ceremonies and why it can be beneficial to have one

If you've already had an entrustment ceremony, I'd love to hear about it!