Once you have selected adoptive parents, you must decide what type of communication you’d like with them prior to the birth of your baby.

Do you wish to spend time with them and get to know them? Do you wish to have them at doctor’s appointments with you? Or do you wish to communicate through emails and phone calls? Or do your prefer to have no contact at all?

The ball is in your court with pre-birth contact and you have to decide what option is the best for YOU. There are different theories when it comes to pre-birth contact.

One theory is that spending time with and getting to know the adoptive prior to the birth of your child can make you feel more secure in knowing that they are the right family for your baby. On the flip side of that, spending time with the family may show you that they are not the right family for your baby. That is still a good thing though because it’s imperative to learn that before you sign papers and things become finalized.

The other theory is that pre-birth contact could make you feel obligated to place your baby with the family. If you start having doubts, but have been spending a lot of time with the baby, some feel that an expectant mother may begin to feel that she “owes” the baby she has “promised” to the adoptive family.

No amount of pre-birth contact between you and the adoptive family obligates you to place your child with them and they are aware of that. If you change your mind, you change your mind and that’s it. You don’t owe anyone your baby.

The amount and type of pre-birth contact you have with the adoptive family is totally up to you. Only do what you feel comfortable with and do not feel pressured to allow more.


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Related Posts:
Choosing an Adoptive Family
Questions to Ask a Prospective Adoptive Family
Tips on Choosing a Prospective Adoptive Family