Let's count all the things that are wrong with this story, shall we? (If you have trouble with the link, the story is "Mom stranded in Iowa when she vetoes adoption" by Dan Gearino of the Quad-City Times, Sioux City, Iowa.)

Read it? Okay, now let's examine how many ethical abuses it contains.

1. The paying of expenses to pregnant women by potential adoptive parents, facilitators or attorneys is coercive. This arrangement causes a vulnerable pregnant woman to think that she owes the paying customers a baby, and that she cannot change her mind. It reduces pregnant women to the status of contracted wombs, or as adoption expert Adam Pertman aptly puts it, "baby-making machines."

2. The lawyer and facilitators in this case were moving pregnant women across state lines--a big no-no. Let's be clear--the only reason to do something like that is to relocate women away from those states with ethical adoption practices to states with bad laws, so as to make it easier to procure a baby through shady dealing.

3. In this situation, the lawyer and facilitator also engaged in housing pregnant women, which adds a whole 'nother layer of coercion. When you are concerned about keeping a roof over your head, chances are you'll sign what your landlord wants you to sign, whether it's the right decision for you or not.

4. The lawyer in this case is claiming to "improve the lives" of pregnant women. Please--she is an attorney, not a social worker. She has no real training or expertise in how to make anyone's life better, and I'm willing to bet that altruism is not her real motive.

5. The expectant mother in this case was harassed by the lawyers and facilitators when she exercised her legal right to change her mind. (Thank goodness the potential adoptive parents seemed to have their heads on straight and did not do the same.)

Now, don't get me wrong -- if everything this article reports is true, the expectant mom in this case does not sound like a winner. But ethical standards have to be upheld for all vulnerable parties, not just the ones we like. It's the only way we can make adoption free and clear of the taint of baby selling.

To recap: if you are pregnant, don't be lured by promises of money, housing, or other assistance in exchange for your baby. Don't let anyone talk you into crossing state lines to give up your baby unless you are fully aware of the relative merits of each state's provisions and you are sure that is what you want to do. Don't work with an adoption facilitator. Don't assume that the people arranging an adoption have your best interest at heart. Remember that even if the party arranging the adoption is a non-profit, someone is making money from the deal, and that where money changes hands, there is a strong potential for ethical abuses.