I’ve written about October being Breast Cancer Awareness Month, but it also National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. It’s a sad topic, I know, but one that still deserves a little attention and a cause that is near and dear to my heart having lost three pregnancies now.

A miscarriage is defined as a pregnancy loss that usually occurs before twenty weeks of pregnancy. Miscarriages are pretty common, more common than I think many of us realize. About one in four recognized pregnancies results in a miscarriage and there are probably more that actually occur as often miscarriages will happen before a woman even knows she is pregnant.

Not too long ago, a friend who had an unplanned pregnancy suffered a miscarriage. When she first found out she was pregnant, she was not very happy about it and was weighing her options of adoption or parenting. She shared with me that after she had the miscarriage she felt very guilty; like it was her fault or that it happened because she was not excited about the pregnancy.

If this happens or has happened to you, please know that a miscarriage is not your fault. Most of the time there is nothing that you can do to stop it or nothing you have done to cause it. Many times when a miscarriage occurs early in the pregnancy, it can mean that the pregnancy was not developing correctly. But again, it’s not your fault and there is usually nothing you or your doctor could do to prevent it. As my doctor says, “it’s just one of those things.”

It typically takes weeks to a month to recover physically from a miscarriage, but the emotional effects can take longer to recover from. Many women may be saddened and grieve and mourn the loss of not only the pregnancy, but the hopes and dreams for the child that they were carrying. This is normal, so know that you are not alone.

Source: March of Dimes