I think Heather has posted about this before, but it’s definitely worth re-mentioning. I believe in most cases, you have to make the decision to place a child twice. Once while you are pregnant and then again for a second time after you have given birth.

During your pregnancy, you may decide that adoption is the best decision for you and your baby. You decide to move forward with it, contact an adoption agency or adoption attorney, and begin the process of selecting families. You may find a family you like and get to know them. You may feel very secure in your decision, right? I know I did. I knew I was doing the right thing – the best thing for my child at that moment in my life.

But then comes the birth of your baby and this little bitty person that you have dreamed about, worried about, and carried under your heart for nine months is in your arms. You look into his or her face and notice the similarities between your baby and yourself. Perhaps you have the same nose or the same shape of the eyes. As you stare into that little, precious face it all seems more real now.

This is when the really hard part comes… You have to make the decision again. You have to consciously choose whether placing is still the route you want to go. This (in my opinion) was so much harder than the pregnancy. No amount of pre-birth preparations could prepare a new mother for the overwhelming amount of feelings she is bombarded with after giving birth.

So once again, you must re-make this decision and re-affirm with in yourself that you are doing the right thing for your child. You may decide for the second that time that adoption is still the way to go, and follow through with placement. Or you may decide that you can no longer move forward with placement and decide to parent. Whatever you decide – the decision is yours.