e-mail
As I said before, there is no time table for grief and you can stay in one stage for days/weeks and then move to a different stage and then you might even track back. All of this is healthy and ok. It’s hard to get to a healthy balance of grieving and living. 
When grief is too intense or last too long it can cause prolonged problems as the sadness evolves into dark depression and anxiety disorders.
Extreme reactions may include:
- Feelings of panic and frenzy
- Emotional numbness that does not go away
- Going to extremes to avoid thinking of the loss
such as abusing drugs or alcohol or becoming totally immersed in work
It’s important to know that grief and depression are not one in the same. While grieving, you can still see the joy in some things such as a beautiful sunset, reading an inspiring poem, etc. There are still events that bring you happy moments. What makes depression different from grieving is the absence of any happy moments or moments of joy. About 2 in 10 people develop a depressive disorder while grieving the loss of a loved one or major life event.
Major Warning Signs of Depression:
- Crying spells or, at the other extreme, lack of emotional responsiveness
- Inability to find pleasure in anything
- Feelings of hopelessness and/or worthlessness
- Exaggerated sense of guilt or self-blame
- Loss of warm feelings toward family and friends
- Lack of interest in prior activities and withdrawal from others
- Neglect of responsibilities and appearance
- Irritability, complaints about matters previously taken in stride
- Dissatisfaction about life in general
If you are not already seeking the help of a professional therapist or counselor, at this point you definitely need to seek help! Sometimes anxiety and grieving can be lightened with a small dose of medications. Talk to your doctor and let him/her know what is going on and see what they recommend.
Sometimes you may feel overwhelmed with grief that you want to take your own life. This is NOT the awnswer. You must remember that no matter how bad it gets, no matter now desolate, lonely, sad, miserable or lost you feel, it will get better. There are people out there who care about you.
Suicide.com has some online resources as well as a toll free number that you can, if you get that low and can’t turn to a friend or family member.
This concludes my series on grief. Thank you for putting up with and reading it. I don’t know why I find grief a fascinating and interesting subject, but I do.
I just have to add that with therapy and medication it still isn’t easy.
Coley, I do not feel “putting up” is the words used to describe how I feel about reading your posts. You are smart and insightful. I know you put a lot of thought into your posts here. I know that they will help someone. I lost a friend to suicide in high school, I wish he had found someone like at suicide.com, that he felt he could talk to. Thanks for sharing this.