Tamara B. is this week’s featured birthmother. Thirteen years ago, Tamara found herself in an unplanned pregnancy. She considered parenting but ultimately decided that adoption would be the best solution for her situation. She and her baby’s birthfather were no longer together and Tamara could foresee the future of struggling with medical costs and college costs as real as the everyday costs involved in parenting a child.
Tamara began meeting with a pregnancy counselor to learn more about adoption. She chose the adoptive parents of her son.
The adoption counselors and I both feel that the Lord had a hand in selecting these parents. They so closely matched what I wanted. There were a lot of similarities, there were artistic abilities and athleticism, and she would be a stay at home mom…….just some of the traits that I desired.
Tamara has a semi open adoption. Open adoptions were not common even just thirteen years ago and were not (and still are not) recognized by her state.
I know their first names, what they named him, and approximately where they live. We send pictures back and forth through the adoption agency and we send gifts at birthday and Christmas.
Tamara mostly feels peace about her adoption but does recall one instance where she was feeling badly about things when her son was around three years old.
Once I had a bad feeling about things, and I stopped by the adoption agency and a call was made and I got to speak with my son’s parents. I could hear him banging on the piano in the background. All my fears were gone during that phone call. They referred to him as “your son” and it just made things alright.
Tamara’s family was a big support during her pregnancy and placement, as well as her boyfriend who later became her husband. Tamara is now a stay at home to two beautiful children, one who is six and the other almost one.
In conclusion, I asked Tamara if she had any advice to share with expectant mothers considering adoption.
Just do the research and pray. When adoption was mentioned to me, I said NO WAY, I am not going to give my baby away and never see him again……but I was misinformed by the media and all of the horror stories that you hear.
Thank you Tamara for sharing your adoption story with us!