This week’s featured birthmother of the week is Jennifer W. Jennifer is a birthmother to two daughters.

At the age of twenty, Jennifer gave birth to her first daughter, Tonya (that’s the name Jennifer gave her, it was later changed.) Jennifer originally intended to place Tonya for adoption at birth, but as her due date neared and the reality became more emotional, Jennifer decided to parent her. Jennifer married her boyfriend (who was not Tonya’s birthfather) five days before Tonya was born. It was a problematic marriage from the get go and he left after just three months of marriage, only to come back shortly later, then leave again.

Jennifer continually struggled with very little support as she parented Tonya for thirteen months. Eventually Jennifer decided she couldn’t do it any longer and contacted an adoption agency.

I spent much of my time (while parenting Tonya) on an emotional roller coaster out of control. Family did not help or support me at all, so I was alone. I continued on the roller coaster and struggled for months. I tried for government aid, but could not get any because I was actually making too much money trying to better myself. It was just a no win situation. I felt I had nothing to give, so I contacted an adoption agency and Tonya was put into transitional care and the process began.

Jennifer chose the adoptive parents for Tonya. She was very specific with what she was looking for in adoptive family which limited her options quite a bit but she wanted them to be everything that she felt she couldn’t be at the time. She read through many profiles of adoptive families and just knew that the family she chose were the right ones when she read their profile. Semi open adoption (which in this case meant Jennifer would receive an update and pictures once a year) was all that was offered to her at the time.

In the next post, Jennifer shares how she became pregnant with her second daughter and why she chose adoption for her a well.


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Previous Birthmothers Featured:
Amy M.
Krissy M.
Tracy V.
Jamie