An Arizona newspaper, the East Valley/Scottsdale Tribune, recently featured an article about several birthmoms from the semi-open and closed adoption systems. Entitled "Honoring Birth Moms," the story looks at adoption from the perspective of three different women, all of whom currently feel positive about their decision to entrust their child to adoption.

While I don't agree with every aspect of how the reporter framed these women's stories (in my opinion, she got a few small details wrong), the article is generally a good one, and worth reading. But its overly personal approach does make me wish for more "bigger-picture" reporting about birth parents. As a wise person once said, "If you've heard one adoption story, you've heard one adoption story." Hearing someone's positive experience or someone's negative experience doesn't do a whole lot to help pregnant couples decide, nor does it do much to educate society at large about the realities of adoption. The fact is that there are plenty of people in both camps--surrendering parents who feel adoption was the right thing for them, those who believe it was the wrong thing, and those who fall somewhere in between.

That's why I believe there is a need for greater context in news stories about surrendering parents. As a former journalist, I understand the temptation to frame an issue using a personal account, but I wish more reporters would resist. Not all birthparents regret their decision, and not all are happy or at peace.

This is the same reason that I encourage all expectant couples who are considering adoption to gather as much information as possible from as many sources as possible. It's impossible to talk to too many people who are living with adoption. The more stories you hear, the better informed you will be about the big-picture view of adoption, and how it's likely to impact your life.

But no matter how much research you do, you'll still have to decide for yourself, since no one adoption story can possibly address all the elements of your particular situation. Don't base your final decision on the choices others have made. Learn as much you can from their stories, but don't try to fit your situation into someone else's mold.

I wish you luck in collecting stories and experiences, both good and bad.