It happened again! I wasn’t having a very good adoption day as it was after knowing that a young woman sitting a few floors above me was about to change her life forever by signing papers to terminate her parental rights.

As if that wasn’t enough to mentally process, not too long after that, I got the dreaded question while sitting with my Mom at the hospital. The question I think I have probably come to hate the most.

Let me replay how it went down –
A teacher at Noah’s school had called my cell phone to discuss a few issues with Noah and after I hung up, I was telling my Mom what the school said while the nurse was in the room. The nurse then started asking me questions about Noah and his disabilities. No problem so far – I love talking about him.

But then it happened, out of no where! I was side swiped! I didn’t even see it coming! I couldn’t run and I couldn’t hide.

“Is Noah your only child?”

I wanted to just cry right there that very second, but I ’m a strong woman. I really didn’t feel like explaining adoption to this nurse right in front of my Mom when my Mom wasn’t feeling very well at all. So I did the dreaded and answered yes. I said yes he is my only child!

I just was not in the mood to explain to this lady that technically I have four other children – three that were miscarriages and are now angels in heaven and one that lives about twenty minutes away from the hospital in a three bedroom house in a quaint neighborhood with his mom, dad, sister, and cat.

As I sit here typing this now, I feel guilty for not acknowledging Charlie or my three baby angels. But I am telling myself that it doesn’t matter what I told this silly lady – because the truth is known in my heart and by God and that is what really matters.