In my last post, I talked about being envious of a friend who is experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and although she thought she would make an adoption plan, her family has agreed to help her. I suggested that if you are pregnant, you should consider talking to your parents about whether or not they would be supportive of your decision to parent, but you may be wondering how you go about this.
I know if I were reading that post in the position I was in over six years ago, I would have wondered just how to ask my parents for support. I’ve been brainstorming this and have a few suggestions.
First of all, it’s probably not the best idea to have this discussion at the same time that you tell your parents or extended family members you are pregnant. Give them a little time to absorb the news and deal with their emotions.
Before beginning this kind of discussion with your parents or other extended family members, find out what it is that you are going to need from your parents/family in order to successfully parent. Will you need childcare while you are working or in school? Would you need a place for you and your baby to live? Would you need help with transportation? Know what it is that you are going to need help with before you ask for help.
Think out some long term goals as well. Map out where you want to be in 6 months after the baby is born, a year after the baby is born, and so on. Of course, that could change as time goes on, but goals are good.
Think about what sacrifices you are going to have to make in order to parent and be prepared to discuss those. Will you have to put off college for a year? Will you need to move back with your parent?
Ultimately, your parents or family could end up being non supportive or you could end up deciding that adoption is the best choice for your baby, but as I said in my last post, at least if you have this conversation this will be one less “what if” that you are left wondering about post adoption.
Telling your Parents about Your Pregnancy