e-mail
(continued from last post)
Q: What do you think is the single biggest danger a woman needs to watch out for when she’s pregnant and talking to adoption professionals?
A: Infants – especially Caucasian – are, sadly, a commodity in great demand. As a result, there are far too many unethical adoption practitioners who are untrained entrepreneurs, not objective counselors, and it is far too difficult to tell the few reputable “good guys” from the bad. Most adoption “agencies” are in the businesses of placing babies. Their paid clients are those seeking to adopt. They are not there to serve your best interest, or even your child’s, and often do their own “rubber stamp” home studies without adequate background checks of prospective parents.
Q: What about fathers? What do they need to be aware of if their partners are considering surrender?
A: The Stork Market devotes a full chapter to fathers’ rights. Sadly, too many fathers never get to “consider” adoption. Many have their parental rights terminated before even knowing that there was a pregnancy, a baby, or a planned adoption. Fathers, unfortunately, have to be aware of the laws in every state that they or the mother have lived in, or may traveled to, because many states have Putative Father Registries that can override paternity, even when proven by DNA.
Q: Some people don’t believe that pregnant women can be coerced in today’s world…they say that responsible, intelligent people don’t let themselves be influenced in such a fashion. What is your response to that attitude?
A: One can be a nuclear scientist but not be familiar with the ins and outs of adoption laws or the short and long-term implications of adoption to one’s self and one’s child. Anyone, no matter how intelligent and well-read, can be taken advantage of in a moment of weakness, fear and self-doubt. That is why laws typically seek to protect vulnerable parties—for instance, widows selling their homes too soon after the death of a spouse. That is also why in all other legal situations, the parties have separate legal counsel to advise them of their rights – not attorneys paid for by one party whose interests conflict with the other’s. It is also why most legal contracts have a cooling-off period. Unfortunately, none of these protections exist with the relinquishment of parental rights.
(to be continued)
“…Unfortunately, none of these protections exist with the relinquishment of parental rights.”
Why is this and how can it be changed? Are there any states in the United States that have such laws? Is anyone working to change this and, if so, how can individuals help?
Why is this? Because people want “their” babies and don’t want to risk the “tragedy” of having to give a child back. The paying clients are the adopting parents. No one gives a rip about the surrendering parents.
Many have tried to change the laws but get exhausted because everyone supports adopting parents and no one’s sympathy lies with surrendering parents. Ethica tries to speak up for birthparents, and so does Evan B. Donaldson, only to get slapped down by the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys.
I don’t have a lot of hope for things changing.
Many have tried to change the laws but get exhausted because everyone supports adopting parents and no one’s sympathy lies with surrendering parents. Ethica tries to speak up for birthparents, and so does Evan B. Donaldson, only to get slapped down by the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys.
According to Adam Pertman, EBD caught hell for recommending longer waiting periods before signing consents and adequate revocation periods, in their paper on birthparents issued last November, SAFEGUARDING THE RIGHTS AND WELL-BEING OF BIRTHPARENTS IN THE ADOPTION PROCESS
http://www.adoptioninstitute.org/research/2006_11_birthparent_wellbeing.php
I just found the actual Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute recommendation:
Recommendation 4: Modify state laws on the timing of relinquishment and revocation so that parents have several weeks after childbirth before an adoption decision becomes irrevocable. Ideally, this would include a minimum of one week after birth before a relinquishment can be signed and then a substantial revocation period.
from the above link.
Coming into the hospital room of someone who just gave birth or one, two, even three days post birth is something out of hell. Yet they caught hell from adoption attorneys et al. for recommending a week.
What kind of society is this.
Coming into the hospital room (to take consent)
This issue really heats me up.
Swooping in like this is nothing short of a predatory act.