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With movies like Juno and television shows The Secret Life of the American Teenager throwing pregnant teens at us left and right, I was pleased to see a movie like Away We Go. Why? It shows us something important, something that those arguing about how every unplanned pregnancy should result in adoption seem to forget. Adults get pregnant, too. Unexpectedly and unplanned, adults find themselves facing a pregnancy. And, shock of all shocks, it can happen to people who are in committed long-term relationships.
Who knew?
More people than you realize know that you don’t have to be a teenager experimenting with sex to find yourself unexpectedly pregnant. As an example, my husband and I were using birth control (properly) when we found ourselves unexpectedly pregnant in June of 2006. We lost that baby, sadly, but were still just as shocked to find ourselves pregnant at all. It happens. All the time. A friend of ours wouldn’t exist if his father’s vasectomy hadn’t completely failed, a year after it was performed.
But just because it happens doesn’t mean it is easy. That’s why this movie sounds like a gem. This moment between the two main characters warmed my heart:
“Are we screw-ups?”
Let me tell you: every parent wonders that sometimes. Whether it is while you are pondering what to do with an unplanned pregnancy or when your child tells you that he doesn’t love you, you fear that you’ve somehow screwed up. The truth is that we all mess up. We make decisions that aren’t always the best. We say things that we don’t mean to say. We doubt ourselves, our decisions and our partners.
But we survive. Our children survive. Hopefully we are wise enough to pass on the information pertaining to our mistakes, our bad decisions, so that our children can make better decisions later in their lives. Hopefully those decisions don’t negatively impact our children in ways that aren’t fixable. Hopefully we’re able to look back and find the humor in the situation.
And hopefully we’re able to put the doubt behind us, even if we experienced unplanned pregnancies, and be the best parents we can be for our children. How we become pregnant shouldn’t affect the type of parent we can be. Remember that one.
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Photo Credit.
