Books You Should Read: Adoption

October 29th, 2009
Categories: Books

BooksWhile reading books about pregnancy is vital to your journey, reading and learning about adoption is important if you are even remotely considering relinquishment. It's hard to know where to start. Unfortunately many books on the subject are outdated but don't come with a warning that says, "This book no longer applies to adoption as we know it." I can think of three books that are recent and relevant. 1. The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler. Presenting readers with a multi-birthmother account of the Baby Scoop Era, this book is a necessary read for anyone touched by adoption. Some people try to dismiss it as history and, as such, unimportant for people dealing with current issues. Not the case… [more]

Books to Read: Pregnancy

October 22nd, 2009
Categories: Books, Pregnancy

BooksExperiencing an unplanned pregnancy is no excuse to go through the duration of pregnancy unprepared. In fact, going into labor without knowing what to expect is probably a bad idea. Whether you are planning on parenting your baby or are considering relinquishment, reading up on pregnancy facts is a good idea. If you have access to a library or if anyone asks you if you need anything, consider one of these few books. 1. Your Pregnancy Week By Week by Glade B. Curtis and Judith Schuler. This was my personal favorite when pregnant with my two (parented) boys. It is a positive, encouraging look at how your body is changing through each week of pregnancy. I like facts. I also like to… [more]

Book review: The Stork Market

May 24th, 2007
Categories: Books, Reviews

I don’t like extreme points of view. I don’t like self-published books. And, as a writing snob, I don’t like sentences that cause me to think, “Where was the editor?” Despite all of these things, I do like Mirah Riben’s new book, The Stork Market: America’s Multi-Billion Dollar Unregulated Adoption Industry. That’s because I view it as a piece of dedicated, tenacious reporting, collecting many disparate facts into one unified whole. By recounting the many ways that the big business of adoption has harmed those it has purported to help, The Stork Market exposes a side of the institution that many would like to ignore. Fortunately, it’s a story that is starting to be told with increasing regularity, whether it’s by people like birth mother… [more]

Your Pregnancy Week by Week Book Review

November 8th, 2006

When I started writing about the book What to Expect When You’re Expecting yesterday, I pulled my pregnancy book of the shelf, thinking it was that book, but it wasn’t. It was Your Pregnancy Week by Week. I guess I’m not that great with titles! A friend gave me Your Pregnancy Week by Week by Dr. Glade Curtis and Judith Schuler when she was done with her copy back when I was trying to conceive our angel baby Darcy as a good luck present. I like this book because it’s broken down weekly, and we all know that your body and your unborn baby change weekly during pregnancy and it takes you through each week, detailing… [more]

What to Expect When You’re Expecting Book Review

November 7th, 2006

What to Expect When You’re Expecting by Heidi Murkoff, Arlene Eisenberg, and Sandee Hathaway is one of those great pregnancy books that is good for just about any pregnant woman, regardless of whether you are making an adoption plan or parenting your first child or fourth. It explains pregnancy and all that goes along with it in general everyday terms that we can all understand. The information in the book is presented month by month and includes information on how the baby is developing and addresses common concerns and questions during pregnancy and also features a nutrition guide for expectant mothers. According to the book review on Amazon, “Each chapter begins with an explanation of what to expect at a… [more]

A book about teen moms

September 17th, 2006

If you’re like most people, you probably have some strong opinions about the topic of teen moms. You might think the statistics prove that such moms are generally doomed to failure, that their kids turn out badly, and that such mothers cause problems for society as a whole. Not so, says a writer who has published a book about teen mothers. According to her, recent studies show that while teen parents do typically struggle in the initial stages, most eventually do just fine, going on to create stable families and raise good kids. Entitled You Look Too Young to be a Mom: Teen Mothers Speak Out on Love, Learning and Success, the book is an anthology of essays from real teen moms… [more]

Letters to Baby Book Review

July 29th, 2006

This book isn’t related to adoption but is (in my opinion) a great book for anyone expecting whether they parent or place their baby for adoption. It was given to me by a dear friend. She purchased a copy for me when she purchased one for her child. letters to baby3 Letters to Baby is a collection of 68 letters to newborns passing along wisdom and inspiration. Each contributor was asked the same question, “What would you tell a newborn baby that you have found to be important in life? The letters are written by various people – some famous and well known and others that are not. Each letter is written from a different view point and is unique. Among… [more]

Two books about loss

July 25th, 2006
Categories: Books

griefI was sitting in a doctor’s waiting room the other day, waiting to get some immunizations for travel, when a book on the shelf caught my eye: Parental Loss of a Child by Therese A. Rando. I had to take it down and look at it, and of course head straight to the index to see how much discussion there was of loss through adoption. I only had time to look briefly, but the content looked pretty accurate. One thing in particular stood out: the notion of adoption as an ambiguous loss, leading to unresolved grief. What is an ambiguous loss? If your wife disappears and is never found, she’s obviously lost to you, but there is no closure, so your grieving is… [more]

Book review: Surprise Child

June 16th, 2006

Allow me to recommend a truly fantastic book for women in unplanned pregnancies. It’s called Surprise Child: Finding Hope in Unexpected Pregnancy and it’s by Leslie Leyland Fields. Whether you consider yourself too young, too old, too poor, too sick, or too overburdened to welcome a child right now, or you have some other special circumstance (such as rape) that makes you doubt your ability to be a good mother, you will certainly find a story you can relate to in this book. It’s one of the few resources I’ve found that encourages women to look at an unplanned pregnancy as an opportunity rather than as a problem to be solved. Fields acknowledges how easily pregnancy can seem like an inconvenience, a stumbling block, or even a… [more]

Book review: My Child is a Mother

May 6th, 2006

Recently I re-read a book that touched on what I wrote in my last two posts, about how parents of women in crisis pregnancies tend to view the baby as a “problem” at first, rather than as a family member. The book is My Child is A Mother: A True and Happy Story of Open Adoption, by Mary Stephenson. Mary is the mother of Karen, who got pregnant at age 17. The book, written in 1991, chronicles the story of how the Stephenson family dealt with Karen’s crisis. Karen realizes from the beginning that she cannot give her baby girl up without knowing where her daughter will be and how she is doing. Someone suggests open adoption, so the family finds themselves at an… [more]