I'll admit it: I'm a fan of the show Glee. I may be well out of the target demographic for the show but having been a musical theater dork in high school, it hits a soft spot in my heart. Add in jazzy music numbers, men who can sing and some hilarious exchanged and I am a fan for life. Except for that whole pregnant teen issue. It's not the pregnant teen that has me feeling icky. Teenagers get pregnant whether they're taught about safe sex methods or members of an abstinence club like Quinn, the character in the show who is pregnant. What has left me feeling icky are all of the dramatic issues surrounding her pregnancy. Let's take a brief look.
While reading books about pregnancy is vital to your journey, reading and learning about adoption is important if you are even remotely considering relinquishment. It's hard to know where to start. Unfortunately many books on the subject are outdated but don't come with a warning that says, "This book no longer applies to adoption as we know it." I can think of three books that are recent and relevant. 1. The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler. Presenting readers with a multi-birthmother account of the Baby Scoop Era, this book is a necessary read for anyone touched by adoption. Some people try to dismiss it as history and, as such, unimportant for people dealing with current issues. Not the case… [more]
Experiencing an unplanned pregnancy is no excuse to go through the duration of pregnancy unprepared. In fact, going into labor without knowing what to expect is probably a bad idea. Whether you are planning on parenting your baby or are considering relinquishment, reading up on pregnancy facts is a good idea. If you have access to a library or if anyone asks you if you need anything, consider one of these few books. 1. Your Pregnancy Week By Week by Glade B. Curtis and Judith Schuler. This was my personal favorite when pregnant with my two (parented) boys. It is a positive, encouraging look at how your body is changing through each week of pregnancy. I like facts. I also like to… [more]
Recently while waiting at the hair salon, I was reading Glamour Magazine and read about an interesting blog called Storked written by a Glamour journalist. The blurb in the magazine interested me enough for me to write it down and come home and look it up later. The blog is written by Christine Coppa. a twenty six year old single woman who was living it up in New York City, dedicated to her dream job at Glamour Magazine when she unexpectedly becomes pregnant. I’ve been reading through the archives and I’m captivated. Not only am I enjoying her blunt style of writing, but I am enjoying her story. Her teaser sums it up pretty well: Imagine that you’re 26 with a cool job… [more]
I ran across some interesting statistics on the number of unplanned pregnancies in the United States. The good news is that the number of teen pregnancies are down. According to Bill Albert, the director of the National Campaign to prevent teen pregnancy the rate of unplanned pregnancies fell 36 percent, which is the lowest it has been in a long time. While the number of teen pregnancies in on the decline, the number of unplanned pregnancies among young women is not. The definition of unplanned (they used unwanted but I don’t like that description) pregnancies in this case is pretty self explanatory, meaning pregnancies that were unintended or ill-timed. According to the Guttmacher Institute, there is a rise among the number of unplanned pregnancies in… [more]
A great resource for those of you who may be experiencing high risk pregnancies is the website and non profit organization, Sidelines. While Sidelines is not adoption or unplanned pregnancy specific it is high risk pregnancy specific. Sidelines is a national non profit organization that provides support for expectant mothers who are experiencing high risk pregnancies for one reason or another. Sidelines was founded by 2 women, Laura Maurer and Candice Hurley in July of 1991 and started out as small chapters spread across the United States. In 2001, they re-worked the entire structure of the organization so that they would be able to provide support based on conditions instead of locations, launched the website, and create a central toll free… [more]
There are a lot of laws involving adoption. While you may not be a legal expert, you can still read up a little bit on the adoption laws in order to be prepared for what is up coming as well as to protect yourself. There are no federally mandated adoption laws. The laws differ from state to state. There are laws that dictate when you can sign papers terminating your parental rights. Some states require you to wait a certain amount of time after the birth of your baby before you can sign relinquishment papers. For example, in Arizona you can not sign until 72 hours after the birth of the baby. There are laws that dictate where you can sign the relinquishment… [more]
I don’t like extreme points of view. I don’t like self-published books. And, as a writing snob, I don’t like sentences that cause me to think, “Where was the editor?” Despite all of these things, I do like Mirah Riben’s new book, The Stork Market: America’s Multi-Billion Dollar Unregulated Adoption Industry. That’s because I view it as a piece of dedicated, tenacious reporting, collecting many disparate facts into one unified whole. By recounting the many ways that the big business of adoption has harmed those it has purported to help, The Stork Market exposes a side of the institution that many would like to ignore. Fortunately, it’s a story that is starting to be told with increasing regularity, whether it’s by people like birth mother… [more]
I’m a big fan of the medical drama, Grey’s Anatomy which airs Thursday nights on ABC. I didn’t see tonight’s story line coming. The show is mainly about a group of residents who work together at a hospital in Seattle. One of the residents is a young woman named Isobel, commonly referred to as Izzy (played by Katherine Heigl). In tonight’s episode, a couple comes up to Izzy at the desk and starts saying something abut their daughter who has cancer and needs a bone marrow transplant. Izzy starts giving them directions to Pediatrics when they tell her that their daughter looks just like her. She looks confused for a moment and they say, “You are our daughter’s birthmother.” I wasn’t paying too much attention until that moment and then… [more]
Now that you have a type of adoption in mind, you can begin to search for an agency if that is the route you choose. Some tips in looking for an agency:
- If you want an open adoption, you need to make sure that the agency handles open adoptions. Some agencies may claim to and in reality it is more of a semi open adoption. If you get a bad vibe from one agency or they don’t seem to offer exactly what you are looking for then try another agency!
- Begin by looking up adoption agencies in the local yellow pages or online. If online, you can read a little information about them on their website, but keep in mind