Recently Nebraska and Alaska both passed baby Safe Haven Laws. They were the 49th and 50th states to pass these laws. Now all of the United States has some type of baby Safe Haven Laws. The only area in the United States without Safe Haven laws is the District of Columbia.

In case you are unfamiliar with exactly what baby Safe Haven Laws are, let me explain. According to Wikipedia, Safe Haven Laws are defined as:

The popular name for United States' laws that decriminalize leaving unharmed infants with statutorily designated private persons... more

In my last post, I ranted about an adoption agency website that boasted their luxury living quarters complete with a swimming pool and twenty four hour state of the art exercise facility for expectant mothers making adoption plans.

On that same agency website was a page that listed the “possible benefits of adoption for birthmothers.” Some of them were basic “benefits” that I’d read before like the ability to continue your educate without juggling a child and... more

In many states, expectant mothers making adoption plans can receive assistance with living expenses either through the adoption agency (which is usually paid for by the prospective adoptive parents anyways) they are working with or from the prospective adoptive parents they have chosen. I understand that living expenses are often needed by expectant mothers considering adoption. In fact, I needed them myself for a short time. Once I began having pregnancy complications and was put on bed rest, I could no longer work. Charlie’s adoptive parents were able to give... more

I think it must not be clear, so let me shout.

I AM NOT AGAINST ADOPTION. I DO NOT THINK IT IS A BAD THING. I DO NOT SEEK TO END THE PRACTICE. I AM VERY AWARE THAT PEOPLE FROM ALL CORNERS OF THE TRIAD HAVE BEEN WELL-SERVED BY ADOPTION.

(Everyone hear that? Good, because I'm a quiet person by nature, and I don't like to yell.)

Why do I feel the need to clarify? Because it seems that anyone who brings up the negatives in adoption is seen as a troublemaker who wants to bring the entire... more

Last week, I shared a newspaper article out of North Carolina with you about the possibility of North Carolina teaching safe haven laws in the schools to students so that they could be aware that safely abandoning a baby is legal in that state. But a story coming out of Iowa has raised the issue of safe haven laws once again.

Ashley Tritt, an 18 year old from Solon Iowa, was vacationing with her parents, brother, and boyfriend in Florida. She hid her pregnancy from her parents and boyfriend and then gave birth alone, in the bathroom. She was arrested... more

As an expectant mother considering adoption you may be reading letters addressed “dear birthmother,” looking at areas on agency websites that say “for birthmothers,” and hear the word birthmother used in regards to you. I imagine it might all be a little confusing to you.

Are you a birthmother? No, not yet! And you may not become one at all if you do not follow through with an adoption plan.

Technically, you do not become a birthmother until you sign the relinquishment papers terminating your parental rights. Until that moment, you are simply... more

So I’m reading the sad tale of Viktor Matthey, a little boy from Russia who was dealt two entirely lousy sets of parents, both birth and adoptive. His original parents were neglectful alcoholics, and his adoptive parents abused and murdered him.

Everybody failed him.

It’s already a horrible story on its own, but it was made worse when I came to this passage about the adoptive family’s home study. The Mattheys were people of modest means—that is, until they decided to adopt:

The... more

I was reading an interview with an author on Salon.com the other day. The book was “Everything Conceivable: How Assisted Reproduction Is Changing Men, Women and the World.“ The author being interviewed happened to be Liza Mundy, who also recently wrote a great piece on open adoption for the Washington Times.

Somewhere in the interview, I came across this passage,... more

Today I want to talk about a phenomenon I’ve often observed but don’t fully understand. It’s the belief of some pregnant women that they are mere vessels, carrying this baby on behalf of someone else.

I can certainly relate to the feeling that perhaps your parenthood wasn’t meant to be, but I don’t follow to the next step of diminishing your ties to the child you are carrying. Women who take this position appear very at peace and unconflicted about the relinquishment choice. They seem to view themselves as surrogates, intended to give life but... more

If you haven’t noticed by now, I am following the great ultrasound debate in my state regarding a law that South Carolina law makers are trying to pass. Source

If this bill is passed and becomes a law it would require women seeking an abortion to view ultrasound photos of their baby before moving forward with an abortion and to sign a document saying they had done so. If passed, this... more