In my last post, I talked about being envious of a friend who is experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and although she thought she would make an adoption plan, her family has agreed to help her. I suggested that if you are pregnant, you should consider talking to your parents about whether or not they would be supportive of your decision to parent, but you may be wondering how you go about this.

I know if I were reading that post in the position I was in over six... more

Have you ever heard the phrase “green with envy?” I’m feeling a little envious of someone at the moment. Her situation is so similar to mine. She’s parenting a child with special needs (not as involved as my son though) and she is pregnant. Her first child’s father passed away and her unborn baby’s father does not want to be involved so she has no father involvement just as I did.

Originally she was considering making an adoption plan. She thought it would be the most responsible thing to do in this situation because her parents are already helping with her first... more

If you are considering open adoption and are being vocal with this consideration or doing any research, you may see (if you are reading online) and hear from others various myths about open adoption. One of those common myths is that open adoption is comparable to co-parenting. I’ve even heard some people go as far as to say that open adoption is a glorified form of baby sitting or that open adoption is “having your cake and eating it too.”

First of all, let’s look at the definition for co=parenting. Co-parenting is defined as:

An arrangement in which... more

Society sometimes views adopted children as unwanted or unloved because the birth mother made an adoption plan and “gave her baby away” that she didn’t want or love her child.

Do mothers who make adoption plans really not love for children or not want them? Of course not! Just because an expectant mother is considering adoption or actively making an adoption plan does not make her baby unwanted or any less loved than the woman painting her nursery pink down the street.

I didn’t try to get pregnant with Charlie and I didn’t want to get pregnant at that... more

In my last post, I talked about some of the pressures you may be facing from a number of different sources. The pressure opinions and well meaning advice from family, friends, your religious affiliation, and your baby’s father (just to name a few) can be overwhelming at times. How do you deal with all of this pressure without locking yourself in a closet until the end of your pregnancy?

I have a few ideas for you.

When you are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, not only are you dealing with the pressure of the pregnancy itself, but you are faced with other outside pressures as you try to make decisions about your future and your baby’s future. In this post, we will explore a few of those pressures. 1. Religion - If you are a religious person, you may be dealing with the fact that you are facing an unplanned pregnancy without the "right" circumstances. Your church and religious background could be putting pressure on you with thoughts of being pregnant and unmarried... more

Thanksgiving is a time in which we usually get together with family members or dear friends, give thanks, and eat turkey, dressing (or stuffing as some call it), cranberry sauce, and all the fixings until we are too stuffed for words! But there may be some uncomfortable moments during the giving thanks and the stuffing mouths for those of you who are experiencing unplanned pregnancies.

Every pregnant woman gets some of that unsolicited yet well meaning advice and I think many women in unplanned pregnancies may receive twice as much of that unsolicited yet well meant... more

One scenario that you might be facing in dealing with your family and their reactions to your pregnancy is their reactions to your choice. For example, in my own situation, my parents (my Dad especially) were supportive of adoption, but were leery of open adoption. They weren’t purposely trying to be unsupportive but they just didn’t understand the concept of open adoption or really even know anything about it. In their day, closed adoptions were the norm, the girl who was pregnant was sent away to have the baby, and it was never spoken of again, supposedly to be forgotten. It could be... more

In my last post, we discussed telling your parents that you are pregnant. They are likely to have any number of reactions. In this post, we will explore some of those possible reactions. Your parents may be shocked at an unexpected pregnancy no matter what your age is, but it may be especially harder for them to deal with if you are young.

First of all, it’s important to remember that these are the initial reactions your parents may have to this new. Remember how you felt when you... more

We need the support and unconditional love of our family and friends and we probably need it the most during an unplanned pregnancy. You may be afraid to share the news of your unplanned pregnancy with your family, especially your parents. You may be tempted to not tell your parents or hide your pregnancy from them. However, this is not a very good idea for a number of reasons.

Hiding a pregnancy can be very stressful and can add additional stress to an already stressful situation and will not be good for your own health and the health of your unborn baby. Additionally,... more