Once you have decided on adoption, you must begin to think about what type of family you’d like to place your baby with. Unlike the birthmothers of earlier years who had no say so in the family that would be raising their child, in this era, YOU get to decide the type of family you want to raise your child and YOU get to select them.

Choosing adoptive parents typically starts with looking at profiles that couples hoping to adopt have put together to let an expectant mother considering adoption learn more about them. The profiles include photos and usually... more

This series has taken on a life of its own. The adoption portion is becoming a lot longer than the parenting portion, so from here on out I will split it up into two different segments – The Parenting Journey and The Adoption Journey. I hope this doesn’t confuse anyone too terribly much!

Check out previous posts in the series:
The Adoption Journey
The Parenting Journey

Now that you have a type of adoption in mind, you can begin to search for an agency if that is the route you choose.

Some tips in looking for an agency:

If you want an open adoption, you need to make sure that the agency handles open adoptions. Some agencies may claim to and in reality it is more of a semi open adoption. If you get a bad vibe from one agency or they don’t seem to offer exactly what you are looking for then try another agency! Begin by looking up adoption agencies in the local yellow... more

Now you hear a lot about things that you will need for your child and you really don’t need all the luxuries that many people consider necessary items.

When I had my first son, Noah, I was barely nineteen years old and my pregnancy with him was considered an unplanned or crisis pregnancy. We had the bare minimum of items. Ten years later, he is thriving and doing well and he doesn’t remember how much or what we had when he was a baby.

I bought a crib from the newspaper for around thirty dollars then cleaned it up a little myself. I bought sheets, bumper pads,... more

“Being a mother is a noble status, right? So why does it change when you put ‘unwed' or ‘welfare' in front of it?” ~ Gloria Steinem

In this post we will explore some resources and support sites that will help you with some of the issues mentioned in the previous posts. I haven’t personally used many of the resources and support sites listed below so I can not personally attest to them. However, they do look like they provide helpful and useful information. I am assuming that some people in unplanned pregnancies will... more

Continued from the previous post

2. Finances Are you working? Do you have any money saved? Can you afford to raise this child? There is WIC and many other programs for single mothers, etc. Look at them and the requirements. What do you have to do in order to qualify?

3. Will anyone be helping you raise this child? Is the child’s father involved? Do you have anyone willing to support you mentally, emotionally, physically, and/or... more

"Two roads diverged in a wood, And I took the one less traveled by, And that has made my life all the different." ~ Robert Frost

You are pregnant. It’s been confirmed by the doctor. It still may feel a little surreal but you now have come to the fork in the road. You have options – two of which we will discuss in the next few days in this blog. You can take the road of parenthood or you can take the road of birthmother hood. Each road has different ups and downs and in turn different results... more

I’m starting a new series today that I am calling “The Journey.” The journey starts when you first find out you are pregnant and in this series will continue until the birth of your baby. I will discuss both the option of parenting and the option of placing. Some of these topics that will come up during the series may have been touched on in the past, but to be thorough I will include them in this series as well.

The first step that comes along in this journey is finding out you are pregnant. Perhaps your period is late, you are feeling nauseous, or... more

Do you ever think that it’s precisely the people who ought to choose adoption that don’t do it?

I’m talking neglectful or abusive parents, or the self-absorbed, or the very young.

It’s almost as though, if you have the presence of mind to think of your child’s best wishes ahead of your own, you probably also have it in you to be a good parent. The people who never even consider adoption in the first place...those are the same ones whose children would benefit most from being raised by another family.

I am thinking of a birthmother I know...we’ll call her Caren.

She was never in any doubt that she loved and wanted her baby, and she desperately... more